When it’s More Than Golf
Over the decades of playing golf, some rounds become those that can truly be considered special. Every round is memorable for one reason or another, but a few stand out for having a deeper meaning than the others. I fondly remember the only round of golf I ever played with my dad and wish I had been given the opportunity for many more of them. The rounds played with my sons will always be cherished as special times. I’m also lucky to have many memorable rounds at North America’s premiere courses solidly tucked forever in my memory. A few weeks ago, another round of golf was locked into my memories, this time for another very special reason.
My friend Tom is one of the most influential people in my life. A few years ago he had suffered a severe medical issue. The stroke has limited his mobility and functionality, but has never caused his love and passion for the game of golf to wane. As he convalesced, working hard to regain parts of the life he had lost, Tom always had a goal to get back to a golf course. I was thankful that it was me whom he chose to be with him as a golf partner once again.
Many will understand having that one close friend who has been on buddy trips and watched the good, the bad and the ugly of countless rounds by your side. Tom is that guy to me. He was with me for my first buddy trip, he was beside me walking the hallowed fairways at Pinehurst, Whistling Straits and Pikewood National. He was with me at Sawgrass, the Robert Trent Jones Trail, and numerous other special places where we still have stories of which we reminisce every time we talk.
Our friendship dates back to the late 90s grounded in many shared passions, the strongest being our love for the game of golf. Tom taught me to appreciate the nuances of the sport and helped me develop a great appreciation for what the game offers. When I was fortunate enough to co-author, “Breaking 100: A Century of Sault Golf,” with Bryan Davies, it was an easy choice when we were trying to decide whom would get our dedication. I was proud then to pen a few words explaining what Tom has meant to my understanding and passion for golf.
This was not the first time for Tom to strive to get back on the tee deck. A severe car crash nearly 30 years ago tore apart his rib cage and left him wondering if he would ever enjoy golf, and the same quality of life ever again. He fought through that nearly catastrophic injury to return to fairways. His skills were no longer that of the once club champion at his hometown course, but he appreciated every swing, every round and every opportunity to play. Being part of a second resurrection of his golf career was even more special than being a part of the first.
Earlier in the year Tom had set me up with a round at the hometown course where he grew up playing as a kid. The day was one of significant pain for him. It was unfortunate that he had to sit out the opportunity to ride shotgun and watch me play. Our disappointment in that lost experience quickly was overcome by one of his great ideas; he decided that he would caddy my round while sitting at his home through text. I needed to check my phone to let them know where my tee shot had ended and wait for his instruction on how to finish every hole. His excitement was palpable and his engagement through me brought a smile to both of our faces. This time we would get the opportunity while sharing the seat of a golf cart.
This time the round was way more than golf. This was about determination, perseverance, and most importantly about friendship. Watching him try to swing a club and struggle was, at times, hard to watch. Those struggles paled in comparison to watching his one-handed putts track to the cup. Some holes were played; others were sat out. It didn’t matter. We were a tandem once again traversing fairways and greens without a care for the outside world.
I had planned a visit to see him in Stratford and he thought it was the time for us to renew our enjoyable times in a golf cart while embellishing stories and sharing laughs. We pointed the car northwest to Woodlands Links just outside of Clinton, Ontario with the goal to resurrect what was a regular part of our friendship. The drive through farm country in the region where he grew up brought out many stories of youthful experiences and reminiscing about his now passed away parents and his extended family still living near the city. I know I was excited to get him back beside me in the cart where he rode shotgun for hundreds of rounds together. I know he was just as excited to come back to a world that was so meaningful to his life. .
Pulling into the parking lot as we’ve done so many times before felt so different this time. Knowing that this was a huge step in Tom‘s physical and mental recovery, made the usual nerves about the round non-existent. I had no expectations and no concern over how well I was going to play. That wasn’t why we were here. This was about Tom and his return to golf. Seeing him get out of the car and walk toward our waiting golf cart was something I had been anticipating since we discussed this important goal over a year ago. I went in to pay and when I returned like so many times before Tom was engaging the starter seeking out playing tips and uncovering the secrets to the round. Oh the good old times were back.
The smile on his face as we departed for the first tee was the sight I long to see again. His mobility challenges made it impossible to tee off so we decided that he would play in as if we were competing in a scramble, as we had often done before. We found iron shots to also be a challenge and decided that putting was an attainable goal for Tom. This was always the strength of his game and predictably, he didn’t disappoint. The excitement of a couple near miraculous one-handed putts ending on the edge of the cup made the day extra special. Tired legs and aching muscles limited the number of holes he played, but that didn’t diminish the thrill he felt about being back on a course and I felt from having my buddy back with me.
Sometimes a round of golf offers up a special location, or a score of which you can be proud. Others can be fun gatherings with colleagues or for a charity outing. This one was something I had never experienced before. It was cathartic, uplifting, and a testament to hard work, goal setting and the importance of having a passion in your life. I’m proud of my friend’s accomplishment and for being able to have my wingman, caddie and friend beside me once again.
